Getting Through Tough Times
Barely a fortnight ago, I was in Singapore, away from my family, sleeping in a chair in ICU next to my dad. Watching machines monitor his every breath, I wondered how I'd get through these tough times. The sterile hospital lighting, the constant beeping, the uncertainty – it was a world away from my usual routine and the foundations that make me feel my best.
Without question, it was one of the most challenging periods of my life. But here’s what I’ve learned: it’s precisely in these moments of crisis that the habits we’ve built in our daily lives become our lifeline. In this blog, I’ll take a look at how you can develop these skills too.
Understanding Resilience
My psychology degree taught me that resilience isn’t something you’re born with – it’s something you build through the choices you make every single day. I used to think resilient people were just naturally stronger, that they had some special quality I was missing. But resilience comes from three things: feeling like you have some control over your life, having people who genuinely support you, and being able to find meaning even in the mess.
When I look back at my darkest moments – and I include those days when I weighed 90kg and my feet could barely support my weight – I had none of these elements in place. I felt completely out of control, isolated in my struggle, and couldn’t see any purpose. You can read about my journey here.
Getting through tough times: The Routine That Anchors Me
When my dad fell ill, it would have been so easy to abandon everything I’d built. The old me would have done exactly that – used the crisis as an excuse to give up, to reach for comfort food, to skip workouts, to isolate myself.
But this time was different.
I tried, as much as possible to maintain the small rituals. A quick five-minute walk between my ‘shifts’ by my Dad’s bedside. Drinking my water to keep hydrated. Sending my daily check-in to the It’s So Simple community. These weren’t grand gestures – they were tiny acts of self-preservation that held me.
What I’ve learned about habits is that when we’re under extreme stress, our brains go into survival mode and we default to whatever patterns we’ve practised most. For years, my default patterns were destructive – emotional eating, isolation, giving up on myself when things got hard. Now, my automatic responses actually help me cope.
The Power of Community
One thing that struck me during Dad’s illness was how my It’s So Simple community rallied around me. Messages of support, understanding when I couldn’t respond immediately, and the gentle accountability that kept me moving forward even when I felt like I was drowning. Getting through tough times isn’t about coping alone.
When we feel truly supported, our bodies actually respond to stress differently. Sitting in that ICU chair, knowing that my community had my back literally helped my body cope better.
The old me tried to do everything alone. But the It’s So Simple approach taught me that vulnerability and asking for help isn’t weakness – it’s actually the cornerstone of real strength.
Being Kind to Yourself When Life Overwhelms
Here’s the really important part: there will be days when even the basics feel impossible. Days when the thought of meal prep makes you want to cry, when a workout feels like climbing Everest, when responding to messages feels too much.
And that’s okay.
I remember one particularly difficult night in the hospital when I felt completely broken. I sat in that chair, grabbed junk food from the vending machine, and just… existed. And you know what? That was enough. Sometimes survival mode isn’t about maintaining your routines – it’s about giving yourself permission to just get through.
The difference now is that I don’t use these moments as evidence that I’m failing. I’ve learned that self-compassion isn’t about lowering your standards – it’s about understanding that being human means having ups and downs.
Some days, your best will look like crushing your workout and eating perfectly. Other days, your best will look like drinking a glass of water and taking three deep breaths. Both are valid. Both are enough.
What's Different This Time
The difference between this crisis and every other difficult period in my life comes down to one thing: I now have a system that works with my life, not against it.
When I was struggling with my weight and trying every fad diet available, I was looking for quick fixes. When life got complicated (as it always does), these approaches crumbled because they were never built to withstand real life.
The It’s So Simple approach is different because it’s designed around the reality that life is messy, unpredictable, and sometimes really hard. It’s not about perfection – it’s about showing up consistently, even when that showing up looks different from day to day.
The Science of Small Steps
My experience has taught me that lasting change happens through tiny shifts, not dramatic overhauls. When I was at my heaviest, I kept trying to change everything at once. When I inevitably couldn’t maintain this pace, I’d give up entirely and feel like a failure.
Now I understand that real transformation happens in the smallest moments. It’s the choice to drink water instead of reaching for another coffee when you’re stressed. It’s doing five minutes of movement when you can’t manage thirty. It’s reaching out to your community when you want to isolate.
These micro-choices might seem insignificant, but they add up. Each small choice reinforces your identity as someone who takes care of themselves, someone who doesn’t give up, someone who asks for help when they need it.
Moving Forward
Today, I’m almost back to my morning routine. I’m working out most days, taking time to eat well, and checking in with my community. But I’m also changed by what I’ve been through. I’m more grateful for the ordinary moments, more aware of how precious our health is, and more committed than ever to helping other women build their own foundations of strength.
If you’re reading this and you’re in the middle of your own storm and getting through tough times feels too much, use the power of community. Whether it’s a health crisis, family challenges, or just the overwhelming feeling that you can’t get your life together – please know that you’re not alone. The path forward isn’t about perfection. It’s about taking the next small step, reaching out for support, and believing that you can build something stronger than whatever is trying to knock you down.
And on the days when you can’t take that step, remember that sometimes the bravest thing you can do is simply let the moment pass. Tomorrow will come, and with it, another chance to begin again.
